The world around me

What do you do when it seems as though the world is falling down around you?

GLOBALLY:

Unfortunately, this doesn't necessarily have to be understood, to date, in the metaphorical sense as in which it is usually spoken. It does seem that the world is falling down with respect to what has gone on in Japan over the last 9 days. I've been both

1. impressed

and

2. vehemently discouraged

with humankind during this catastrophe specifically (as with most all of them, actually), and this is probably a common sentiment during any global disaster. I've been impressed with what I've seen as to how the Japanese people are handling this disaster. I'm not necessarily referring to Japan's government or any regulatory group, but rather the people... the people that have been most affected. On Rachel Maddow's MSNBC evening news show, specifically during the last 5-10 min. of the show, she showed footage of a few of the rescue efforts that were most compelling (15 March 2011 episode, I podcast it on iTunes). Mind you, these were not military helicopters scooping up people, these were human chains, people carrying other people... heart warming. There has likely been more footage than I can even imagine floating around the airwaves the past week. Given that I don't have a TV with any English channels, this limits me from unintentionally seeing anything, which I think is good. I have to actively pursue it on the internet, and for that reason I go only to sources I believe to be reputable. This helps, as I don't think I could handle the other side of disaster right now, and by that I mean the propaganda, the lunacy, the fear mongering in the media and in the general public, the hate, the ignorance, the disrespect. That's the ugly side of this and I think that, regardless of how serious the potential for meltdown is at Fukushima, it will be how the world handles it that will be the tipping point, not the fact that it's happened. It's how you handle catastrophe and chaos... hmmm...

LOCALLY:

Having said all of that, what about in every day life? What happens when the (2.) latter description (vehement disappointment) overshadows the (1.) first description (impressed) in your daily routine? I have what I call IHHK (I Hate Hong Kong, not I HEART Hong Kong, as the image to the left portrays... I have those days too, though!) days, and the frequency of these days occurring is roughly 3 days per week lately. Sure, I have IHHK moments, but when I have a full IHHK day, I worry. Can I liken it to sitting in front of the TV watching Fox News -- or some other right-wing, conservative, fear-mongering media conglomerate -- mindlessly letting them fill my head and heart with whatever they think is going on or whatever they think is important? So, in a sense, I'm letting the parts of the outside world -- in this case Hong Kong and it's residents, language, culture -- shape me, and determine my perception of the world and myself. Granted, there are aspects of the culture here that I like, but the ones I do not like are more numerous and profound for me. So, it does seem, often, that the world, not just on a global scale, when disaster strikes, but also on a local scale when immersed in a different country and culture, is falling down around me.

PERSONALLY:

I can look at my yoga classes to see this resonates on a more personal level too. Of course, yoga is my great metaphor of life! So, I could rephrase the question that I posed at the beginning of this blog.

What do you do when the rest of the yoga students in your class are falling down around you?

Sometimes, I fall too. Lately, I've been falling a lot and not necessarily because I'm pushing myself to the outer periphery of my virtual capacity and abilities in my yoga practice. I'm falling because I'm distracted. I'm paying attention to other people's issues and challenges, the limits of their abilities, their perceived weaknesses, etc. rather than my own. Sometimes I pass judgement too. I think to myself, "wow, if they would have only listened to the step-by-step instructions of the teacher, instead of rushing, they'd have at least made some progress in the posture" or maybe even "they aren't even trying." Then I fall. It's only when I come back to my intentions, bridge my ego with my intentions (topic for my next post I promise), centre myself, draw awareness to my core, an focus my gaze that I am in my own balance again. Sometimes this is impossible for me until that final Shivasana.

For example, today I practiced hot yoga with Bernadette Leung. During the practice, some lady

one or two mats away from me was burping or making some sort of pig snort for the entire hour, and not just one every 10 min. or so, literally several sounds per minute! It was so loud and so guttural, I was horrified! While usually I would just acknowledge that "WTF?" thought bubble that is perpetually above my head, today it disappeared and all I could do was get really angry about it. It was affecting me and my practice and offending me personally. The thoughts that entered my thought bubble, hence pushing the benign "WTF?" out of there, included but were not limited to the following:

"What on earth did you eat?"

"Do you realize how loud you are?"

"Your burping is making you fall out of every posture!"

"I can't see any of your knuckles or joints, do you have chronic edema... and again, what do you eat that makes your body respond this way?"

"Is yoga part of the solution? If so, that's fine, but maybe a private class is a better idea."

I either wanted to ask her what was wrong or exclaim "jing dee!!" I looked around, and it didn't seem as though the other 50 students were even as close to being as affected as I was, however.

Ok, so what is wrong with me then? There were several times when I regained my focus and was able to ignore the disturbance. There was no acceptance, however... during those times, I was just ignoring... ignorance? Ignorance is bliss? What does this all mean in the grand scheme of things, though? If I were to use the "just ignore it" or "ignorance" tactic for the LOCAL and GLOBAL examples above, what would that look like? NOT GOOD! As I mentioned, it's hard enough in a full, sweaty, technically challenging yoga class to acknowledge and regain your focus and go back to your core strength and deep-rooted knowledge with every little disturbance you experience. That's a daily challenge, and some are better at it than others.

Indeed, we're all at different stages of our journeys. When the disturbance gets so profound, maintaining our centre is more difficult. Fighting fire with fire isn't the answer either though. LOCALLY, if that were the case, during my daily commute, I'd intentionally step on peoples toes, push and shove, talk really loudly on my phone, burp without covering my mouth, eat really stinky food while slurping it loudly... the list goes on. On a PERSONAL level, if fighting fire was the case during my yoga class, I'd stomp loudly and slam the door when entering the studio, I'd drop my water bottle and not think a thing about it, and instead of burping 3 times

per minute for an hour, maybe I'd pass gas from the other end just as frequently to add the smell component to the situation. Although, maybe I already have a strange smell to me, as Asians say Westerners smell like cheese. Would it have been the same if someone was farting 3 times per minute for the entire class? I'd die to be a fly on the wall of that yoga studio (with a clothes pin on my nose, of course). Finally, we all know what it looks like when fire is fought with fire on a GLOBAL scale. It is not usually productive over the long term and can usually heighten catastrophe and chaos. That's definitely NOT how Japan is dealing with things in my mind, which is good and a relief. What I see is the workers of Fukushima Daiichi doing what they know to be the right response protocol, using every resource they have and all of the safety training under their belt to make sure that the situation does not get worse. Meanwhile the brilliant engineers are using all of their knowledge, a collective intelligence that could never be quantified, to come up with short-term and long-term solutions so that not only the area but the entire country and Asia, for that matter, stays safe. They are learning and will continue to learn a ton from this, no doubt, and likewise for the rest of the world. Indeed, there have been some amazing scientists interviewed on TV (several on Rachel Maddow's show) and radio that have informed the general public as to the ins and outs of this disaster from their scientific perspective, but in lay man's terms, which is crucial. Again, they are leaning on their core strength, which is their education and capacity to educate others... not fear.

So, what's to be said from all of this? I've outlined my current and timely thoughts and examples for what happens when the distracted and panic buttons are pushed on a GLOBAL, LOCAL, and PERSONAL scale. If yoga is the metaphor for my life, and what Bernadette said in class today:

"Your yoga practice is an outward expression of who you are."

rings true, then that is the most important lesson I can learn right now. My annoyance and anger and frustration today... that is not who I am... the core strength, focus, education, intelligence, foresight, and intentional actions that I had a few glimpses of this morning... that's me, and not just in yoga, but also in every day life. Namaste नमस्ते...

Thoughts?

Weaknesses

While I can be She-Ra or Superwoman in the gym or in academic or health situations, I have my kryptonite. There is quite a bit of value to doing this.

My Weaknesses…

I am self-critical.

I can be easily overwhelmed.

I am very sensitive to noise, people that are noisy.

I have a really hard time with my body image.

I get caught up on details, often missing the big picture.

I get stuck in my head and generate negative thought processes.

I can convey judgment or disapproval to others.

I often feel that I have to prove myself to others.

I am very much weakened when I’m lonely or ill.

I can bring others down when I’m in a bad mood.

I can easily feel inadequate, and it stifles my progress.

I can be late, which makes people have to wait on me.

I hold myself to a very high standard and expect perfection.

Continuing the theme of strengths

In my last long post, I left off wondering how to effectively identify our natural talents. We are told as children and young adults what our talents are. There were things I was "good" at, like ballet, long-distance running, teamwork-related activities, a bit of art/creative stuff, etc. Yes, these were things I liked to do but I was also told that I was good at them and should further pursue them. Told by whom? Do these people, regardless of how close they are to us (friends, family, teachers, etc.) really take into consideration how we are reacting and feeling about a certain said talent? Maybe. Sometimes they do have a bird's eye view. Furthermore, do these "talents" change as we enter adulthood? Everything else changes as we enter adulthood, as we start to make it our utmost priority to be functioning and influential adults in our families, communities, career fields, etc. How do our natural "talents" influence how we function in these respects? How do our "talents," which we can develop into "strengths" help us become good leaders in said aspects of our lives? That is what I'm hoping to figure out.

So far, I've learned a few things about how to discover talents, but I'm still unsure if my talents have always been or how they've changed throughout my life. My brilliant wife reminded me a while back to pay attention to activities I'm doing where I completely lose track of time because I am so "in to" whatever it is I'm doing. I can think of many, such as:

1. some types of art projects,

2. analyzing data,

3. developing a really neat research idea,

4. cooking,

5. making graphs and figures for a manuscript,

6. working on a presentation,

7. developing a lecture or seminar,

8. hanging out with friends, talking, playing games

9. going for a hike

10. writing my blog

11. exercising or talking about exercise and nutrition.

This list names a few of these types of activities that, in my life, I can get carried away and

completely lose track of time. However, I wonder a bit, as some are not consistently like that, e.g. meaning that I consistently lose track of time enjoying what I am doing. For example, sometimes I'm doing yoga and wondering when it will be over! Ha ha!! Does that mean that yoga is not a talent? Hmmm... I realize that this strategy is only a start to figuring things out, however. I've read to pay attention to five distinct themes regarding an activity, hobby, sport, etc.

1. Yearnings: you feel as though an internal force leads you to that activity or environment over and over and over again.

2. Rapid learning: while doing this activity, you find as though it is easy for sparks to fly and you really understand what is going on, are able to acquire any new skills associated with that activity or gain new knowledge associated with the ideas of the activity

3. Satisfaction: you feel a sense of great achievement when participating in these activities, when you take on and successfully meet challenges, they are extremely energizing experiences , fuelling you

4. Timelessness (close to what I was referencing above): you become so engrossed in this activity you completely lose track of time

5. Glimpses of excellence: you or others observe moments of outstanding performance in these activities

I can think a bit more about these five themes and the aforementioned 11 talents I think that I have, based on timelessness. Do they fit for the other four criteria as well? Yes and no. Having said that, I have also been going through the first module of Level 1 of Susanne Conrad's goal setting and leadership program. Part of this module involved interviewing people that are very close to you about their perception of you (me). I have interviewed 7 of the 8 people in my life that I definitely wanted to interview. I'd like to interview a few more that are close to me, but this has been a good start. The hard part for me has been that it has to be via voice at least, if not in person, which would be ideal because this module also dealt with communication, specifically listening. Being 8, 14, or 16 hours time difference to almost everyone on this list made that logistically challenging, but with skype I have managed to make it happen. However, I'm still waiting to work out a time and day with my sister, who has been ill. Germane to the earlier rhetoric on talents and strengths, the majority of the nine questions request your friend/family member/colleague, whomever you are interviewing to describe your strengths and talents. For example, "What do you see as my key strengths?" "When am I most powerful?" and "When am I most inspired?" I'm finding this most helpful... incorporating perceptions of me by others that are extremely close to me, on one level or another. This is equally important, in my mind, as figuring out things on my own. Because these people are being lead by me, influenced by me, and/or inspired by me in some way or another, by seeing ME inspired and feeling great about what I am doing. It is that kind of back-and-forth reciprocity that is the whole point of this!

I'd like to talk more about others' perceptions of me relative to my talents (that I have developed into strengths), but given that I committed to including my sister's thoughts, I really want to wait and thus will save that information for a post a little later in the week. Meanwhile, as I am hugely supportive of Strengths based Leadership and Strengths Finder, which are Gallup-based survey protocols to help people sift through the nonsense of every day life and identify their strengths and talents. I highly recommend this to anyone and everyone, especially if you are in this transitional-type period of your life. This has really given me a foundation to further explore my talents and hone my strengths as a result. Furthermore, I am more cognizant of those with which I surround myself, not only on a personal/friend day-to-day basis, but also in my professional life and eventually the laboratory and research team I am establishing during my career as a scientist.

So, I started reading the the Strengths based Leadership book last summer (2010) and a lot of the content really resonated with me, leading me to take the very long strengths-finder test that they offer online if you own the book. The overall theme of the book was that knowing your strengths and investing in others' strengths, getting people with the right strengths on your team, and understanding and meeting the four basic needs of those who look to you for leadership is what being a good leader is all about. Again, at the brink of a major transition point in my career, I thought that there could be no better time!

Four basic domains of leadership (needs of those that look to you for leadership):

1. Executing: a good leader needs to be able to put an idea into motion, they take an idea and make it happen

2. Influencing: a good leader can take charge, speak up, and yes... influence people

3. Relationship building: good leaders can create groups and organizations that are much greater than the sum of their parts, they are likened to the glue that can bind ideas and people together to work even better as a group

4. Strategic thinking: good leaders can easily absorb and quickly analyze information while determining how it will affect future actions and make better decisions

Every leader will have their strengths spread out between these four domains differently. It is the domains that don't get filled by the leader that raise the awareness as to the type of people he/she wants to attract to his/her team. This is what makes me think that I will be a good academic supervisor (graduate students and supervising large projects and communicating huge ideas) because my strengths, I've found, fall into every category except the first domain (executing). In other words, I'm just not strong at actually doing the project. I can get it going, get the team together, get the information and planning done, and get everyone motivated, but when it comes to collecting the data... that's where I need my team!

You can't imagine how validating that is! For years, I've thought something was wrong with me. I'd love getting a project going but actually doing the experiments... nah! Well, let me back up. I love doing the experiments the first few times, but once they get to be routine... I'd prefer to move on! But then when it was time to sort through the data and determine how to communicate it all and get everyone excited about our findings... I'm back! This sounds kind of bizarre, I'm sure.

So, drum roll... my strengths are as follows:

Within the "Executing" domain:

nothing

Within the "Influencing" domain:

1. Activator

2. Maximizer

Within the "Relationship Building" domain:

3. Harmony

4. Individualization

Within the "Strategic Thinking" domain:

5. Learner

There are 34 "strengths" in total, and the survey/testing is based on scenarios that are given and your responses to those scenarios. I remember it taking a long time, at least an hour to complete. But I am very intrigued with the outcome and integrating it into my plans for my future, both in my career and in my personal life.

I'm going to spend the next few blog posts to delve into what each of these "strengths" mean to me and how I will utilize them to the utmost potential in setting and achieving my goals and continuing to surround myself with the types of people that a) are in line with my values, b) will help highlight my strengths, and -- because of their own innate talents and strengths that I have learned to recognize and appreciate -- c) will make up for my weaknesses. I'm sensing my favourite word coming on... interdependence. I leave it at that for tonight!

To be continued...

Remake ourselves?

"As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world as in being able to remake ourselves."

- Mahatma Gandhi